Las Vegas Gleaner

CORRECTION: Barack Obama wins alleged NV GOP caucus

While working on a CityLife column to be published later this week your Gleaner asked the calculator a couple simple questions about the 2012 Nevada Republican Presidential Flop held over the weekend:

• The Secretary of State's office reports a tad more than 400,000 registered, active Republican voters in Nevada. Less than 33,000 of them showed up to caucus Saturday, which means for every 100 Nevadans who are so misguided and/or ill-informed that they actually register as Republicans, 92 of them stayed home. Apathy? On the contrary, that's aggressive rejection of the field.

• In their 2008 caucus (attendance: 120,000), Democrats registered nearly as many new voters on caucus day alone as showed up at Saturday's Republican fiasco-fest.

• For months (years) we've been hearing how how much supercalifragilistic work the Mittles campaign has done "on the ground" in Nevada. And sure enough, all that effort by Romney's magnificent organization culminated in turning out a stunning 4 (four) percent of registered, active Nevada Republicans on caucus/flop day.

Throw in a couple bonus statistics -- 100 percent of what Mitt Romney says is wrong and 0 percent of Americans want to have a beer with him -- and you could say that Barack Obama won the whole danged weekend. Except of course Madonna did.

Eddie Haskell undefeated in Nevada's irrelevant caucus

Sheldon wouldn't give Newt an advance on his allowance so there was no ad war to speak of.

And his handlers wouldn't release Mitt Romney from his hermetically sealed environment long enough for the nominee-by-default to suggest that poor people should self-deport or somesuch other mitticism.

So just as in 2008, in 2012 everyone is left wondering: Did the Nevada Republican presidential caucus even happen?