Thursday morning, Republican gubernatorial candidate Joe Heck was scheduled to strip and wrap himself in a Don't Tread on Me®
flag, bow before a portrait of Ayn Rand, put his hands over his ears, close his eyes, chant "I vow never to support a tax increase," and then seal the deal by drinking deeply from a puppy skull full of Grover Norquist's urine that is kept for just such occasions under the protection of a Wackenhut security team at Citizen Outreach's Nevada headquarters.
I bumped into Heck while looking in on a madcap menagerie of teabaggers a couple weeks ago, and after ribbing him some -- ostensibly sane man, a physician, no less, pandering to the kooks, etc. -- we were talking about state taxing and
spending and long story short I asked him if he had taken the government-hating blood oath, or as its champions like to call it, the anti-tax pledge.
He answered my question, first, by saying no, then by noting that he has already sworn an oath as a doctor, and then adding something about being a man of his word.
Then we had to hush because, if memory serves, the birthers were pledging allegiance to the flag or to Goddy
McGod or some damned thing, and the conversation sort of petered out. Anyway I never really gave it much more thought.
But now that Heck has irresponsibly pledged to never raise taxes no matter what, I'll confide that I walked away from our conversation mildly impressed that he had seemed to reference his oath as a physician when asked about the anti-tax pledge so as to suggest that the former was serious and worthy of swearing to, while the latter was not.
And when he said he was a man of his word, I took it -- and I could be totally wrong, s'pose -- to mean that he intended to earn the trust of voters without submitting to puerile stunts foisted on candidates by ideology-blinded bullies from Washington.
But, eh, what the hell. The important thing is that your Gleaner absolutely could not be more pleased to see that Heck has decided that he must bow down to kiss the pudgy wingnutted feet of Grover Norquist and his Nevada acolyte, Chuck Muth. Currying favor with the GOP's government-hating base could boost the chance, however slight, that Heck can stay in the gubernatorial primary all the way to the end and help split up the GOP vote enough for Jim Gibbons to squeak to victory.
The people who brought us Gibbons may be lining up behind Brian Sandoval (who is also tacking to the right). But as I've said time and again, it would be far, far too convenient for Nevada Republicans and all those campaign contributors who insisted that Gibbons simply had to be governor to now get rid of the disturbing neurotic in a GOP primary. It is only fair and right that they be saddled with their erstwhile favorite all the way through a general election.
So in the spirit of the confused Notre Dame cheerleader (who apparently has become this little website's photographic content du jour, for this week anyway), please join your Gleaner in urging Heck to keep up the good work.
Go, cynical and irresponsible sycophant, go!
Oh, and an open note to Sandoval: Don't you dare flip-flop and take that anti-tax pledge yourself! Your continued refusal to do so, coupled with the right's attacks on what they like to call the "Guinn-Sandoval tax hike," could keep the primary competitive right down to the wire.
Recent Comments