Las Vegas Gleaner

Nevada Democrats lead the way

Determined to show all the naysayers that they do so possess the functional competence to hold a county convention, area Democrats are set to give it another go, and now seems a good time for the party to leave behind all the rancor, petty bickering and bitter divisions that accompanied Nevada's first-ever prominent and focused foray into presidential politics.

Instead, everyone should celebrate the excitement of the campaign that was and the way that Democrats got energized. Why, look at the state party's magnificent growth in registration. Marvel at how many volunteers have become involved in the political process for the first time. Rejoice in the knowledge that the caucus process effectively elevated Nevada's Democrats to a new level of organizational prowess that reaches up from, and deep down into, each and every one of hundreds of individual precincts. The party is bigger, stronger and more dynamic than ever before, and all that work is really going to pay off in the fall.

Or at least one hopes so. Because the party appears to be rather pointless so far this spring.

Let's recap: With state budget revenues falling well short of projections, a dullard governor appealed to the hackneyed ideological instincts shared by his most ardent apologists and unimaginatively proposed dealing with the problem by simply slashing state spending.

Yes, that is the only solution, Democratic leaders agreed.

Oh, there was the occasional Democratic lawmaker hemming about the process here or hawing about the sanctity of a particular program there. But what there most definitely was not was any spirited, comprehensive and coordinated defense of the role of state government in the lives of Nevadans, a defense that might have called on the party's supposed newfound organizational prowess to rally popular support for an alternative solution to the slash and burn approach forwarded by the nation's worst governor.

Granted, it is difficult to rally support for an alternative where there isn't one. And there wasn't one, because whatever other specifics it might have entailed, a genuine, meaningful alternative ultimately would require large corporations such as Target, Bank of America, Union Pacific or Embarq to start doing something that they currently do not do: paying taxes in this state.

"Taxes," by the way, refers not to the cutesy negligible half-assed wage-based fraction of a percent payroll tax that corporations and bidnesses pay now (as John Edwards might ask, why are we taxing work instead of wealth, anyway?). In this instance, "taxes" refers to actual, real taxes, corporate income taxes, like corporations pay in just about every other state except for the ones like Nevada that are fucking stupid enough to let these corporations make jillions that they would not make if not for publicly provided roads, schools, health and social services that the companies don't pay for.

Although the fundamental and outrageous unfairness of letting some of the world's largest corporations leach off of Nevada's social, educational and physical public infrastructure while the state goes backward and its citizenry suffers is plain for all to see, Nevada's Democrats will not call for a corporate income tax. They're afraid that if they utter the word "tax," they won't be reelected (or elected to whatever new office they've set their sights on) — though if they're too cowardly to make the case for responsible governance in the public interest, perhaps they should ask themselves why they want to get elected to anything in the first place.

For all the talk of about how the presidential caucus was a wonderful means of growing and organizing the Democratic Party in Nevada and is going to help "turn Nevada blue," elected Democrats at the state and local level apparently aren't buying it. At least they don't think the party has been built to the point that it might be called upon to rally popular political support for a corporate income tax on AIG, Morgan Stanley or ExxonMobil. Judging by the actions, or lack thereof, of Nevada's Democratic leaders, all that work by so many people, all that enthusiasm for change and optimism about the election, is still no match for a handful of well-funded knee-jerk anti-government wingnuts with an email database and/or the Review-Journal editorial page.

Nevada's Democrats are invigorated, and yes by all means yippee, hooray, huzzah, etc. — but we shouldn't get too awfully optimistic and expect the excitement and energy to manifest itself in something approximating a progressive policy agenda. To loosely and inelegantly paraphrase the party's presumptive national standard-bearer, that's more than one should hope, because Nevada's Democrats don't have the audacity. 

Officials begin probe of growing threat to society from unarmed mothers married to ice cream truck drivers

It's perfectly OK for police to shoot a mother as she's trying to regain her feet after being tasered and while her children look on in horror. At least that's what a Henderson police spokester — speaking presumably for police chief and former Assembly Speaker Richard Perkins — says he expects a coroner's inquest will determine this week. LVRJ

Inasmuch as the gunning down of Deshira Selimaj next to her husband's ice cream truck (maybe Perkins' buddy Rep. Jon Porter had warned police that intelligence gathered by Dick Cheney indicated ice cream trucks were transporting weapons of mass destruction into suburban neighborhoods in Republican congressional districts, putting officers on edge) has become such a high-profile case, the public might have expected Perkins himself to be fielding questions from the media, instead of letting an underling do the talking.

But it is probably better if Perkins limits his association to the case as much as possible. Perkins is about to "officially" cash out of public service and become a "consultant" full-time. The Southern Nevada code of bidness and consulting ethics for former elected officials who graduate to the more lucrative private sector dictates that in times like these, the public official's credibility and effectiveness on behalf of current and prospective clients must be the top priority.

Anyway, given the stack of witnesses who have come forth publicly to totally dispute the police account of the homicide (Sun), if the former Speaker's spokester is right and the coroner's inquest leads to the same decision that always results from a coroner's inquest around here — the cop's actions were "justifiable" — that might be the best thing for the community. It would further expose, in an incontrovertible sort of way, that even after some window-dressing changes adopted last year, the inquest process is still a farce (LVRJ) in need of dramatic overhaul.

But while the Selimaj tragedy may be the most bizarre and horrific death at the hands of local law enforcement recently, it's far from the only suspicious one. Whatever the ruling in the Selimaj homicide, the case might also serve to remind everyone that so far this year, area cops have been killing more people than ever, and while the inquest process is a problem, something also seems a tad amiss within the local gun and badge subculture generally.

Las Vegas One, cable channel 19 is reportedly going to be covering the Selimaj inquest, which is scheduled to start at 9 a.m. Thursday and continue into Friday.

DCCC on Martin: No, you're the stinky poophead

Folks at the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee said they did so return calls from NV CD3 Democratic candidate Andrew Martin's campaign. They just weren't very impressed with what they heard.

Tuesday's Las Vegas Sun story on Martin included this passage:

Martin had reached out to party elders — Reid and Rep. Shelley Berkley — and the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee in January 2007. He said he left 27 messages. No one returned his calls, he said.

For reasons since forgotten (and probably to be regretted), the Gleaner forwarded the Sun story to the DCCC and asked if anybody would care to refute Martin's assertion. And they did.

"Any claim that Andrew Martin's calls weren't returned is simply untrue," said Yoni Cohen, Western Regional Press Secretary for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee. "The political department spoke with Martin's consultant and told him he needed to do his local politics and demonstrate his viability.

"At this point, an objective observer must admit that Robert Daskas has substantially more support from people within the district and that is one of the reasons he is on the Red to Blue program," Cohen added, referring to the program wherein the DCCC identifies a limited number of Democratic challengers for financial support in races that are expected to be competitive.

By naming Daskas as a Red to Blue candidate, the DCCC has endorsed Daskas over Martin in the CD3 Democratic primary. Martin, not suprisingly, thinks that's poopy.

The Gleaner only met Martin once, last year, and the only specific part of the conversation that we remember was telling Martin about Jon Porter and John Ensign's Campaign Architect O' Sleaze, Little Mikey Slanker, whom Martin had never heard of because of course the candidate had just moved to Nevada. The only other recollection from that encounter was of a more general nature, consisting of the conclusion that Martin's candidacy against Porter is not only hopeless but nor is it interesting, charmingly Quixotic or worth paying much attention to.

That's not to defend the DCCC, mind. That outfit still looks like the same shop full of political hacks on the D.C. crony scene it's been for years. Just saying, that's all...

Berkley takes advantage of sick old man

Nevada Rep. Shelley Berkley is crowing because lame duck U.S. senator and nuclear power theologian Pete Domenici suggested during a Senate hearing Wednesday morning that maybe all the icky nuclear waste should be stored in his very own New Mexico instead of at Yucca Mountain.

"Senator Domenici today dropped a bombshell on the DOE when he said we should be looking at New Mexico as an alternative to Nevada for high level nuclear waste disposal," Berkley said in a statement. "The myth that Yucca Mountain is the only place we can store this radioactive waste has been shattered by the senior Senator from New Mexico.  He calls Yucca Mountain a box canyon because its failures cannot be overcome, including an $80 billion price tag and the risk to 50 million Americans from decades of nuclear waste shipments to Nevada."

Berkley conveniently refrained from acknowledging that Domenici probably can't be taken seriously because he suffers from a rare form of dementia that "may cause drastic personality changes and loss of inhibition that may cause patients to act in appropriate or deeply embarrassing ways in public." No, really, he does.

Marital strife and gunplay don't mix, anyway

Here's the marvelous lead from Anjeanette Damon's story in the Reno paper:

Gov. Jim Gibbons temporarily surrendered his concealed weapons permit earlier this year after it was discovered he didn't complete the required qualifications training for his nine handguns.

The story goes on to explain that Gov. Pervus A. McSkanktard is now and always has been a certifiable (but apparently no longer certified) gun nut, which should surprise absolutely no one, McScurve being so obviously a deeply insecure individual who, struggling with a constant need to compensate for his profound sense of inadequacy, desperately tries to mask powerful self-doubts about his own masculinity behind a cache of firearms.

The predictability of Perv's gun nuttery notwithstanding, there is virtually no conceivable way that the act of him carrying a loaded weapon is going to end well in the long run. And so he is also an excellent prima facie case for comprehensive behavioral and emotional testing prior to gun sales.

Set list for Porter's sucky and unlistenable band obtained

One of the reasons War Party Rep. Jon Porter is a career politician is because budding careers as a member of the clergy and a rock star petered out. He pretty clearly has abandoned whatever aspirations he may have harbored as a theologian. But his smooth keyboard stylings are still a hit with the ladies, and he keeps his chops fresh to this day by playing in garage bands that suck.

Taking note (get it? "Note" — ha ha. Sigh) of Porter always managing to find time in his busy schedule to "jam," as the kids of Porter's generation call it, the Nevada Democratic Party made a funny:

While Porter may be spending more time tickling the ivories these days in order to ramp up his career as an aspiring lounge musician, it hasn’t prevented “Johnny One Note” from playing off the same page in Washington with the special interests when it comes to the war in Iraq, health care and the economy.

In that spirit, we’d like to suggest the following set list for the Congressman to help him tune up his message to his Inside the Beltway groupies:

“Born to Run” by Bruce Springsteen 
Jon Porter is a career politician. That’s why he can tell you with a straight face that he supported a bill to increase for Children’s Health Care even though he voted EIGHT times to stop that very bill from coming to the floor for a vote.

“Blowin’ in the Wind” by Bob Dylan
Porter recognizes the winds of change in his district — which now has 20,000 more registered Democrats than Republicans. He is running to save his political life, but we know he spent two terms as a rubber stamp for President Bush, taking hundreds of thousands of dollars through his friends like Bush, Vice President Cheney, Karl Rove and Tom DeLay.   

“Let it Be” by the Beatles
While 18 percent of Nevadans go without health insurance — higher than the national average — Porter stands by and offers no real solution.

The state party offered several more suggestions, and they're listed after the jump. Meantime, because pretty clearly the idea is for everyone to play:

"Ride of the Valkyries" by Richard Wagner: Because Porter loves the smell of sleazy attack ads in the morning.

"You Make Me Feel Like a Whore" by Everclear: Sung by Porter to executives within the private-sector student loan racket.

"Thank Heaven for Little Girls" by Maurice Chevalier: This could apply to Tom DeLay letting Porter take credit for an innocuous part of a child protection bill. Even though the bill had broad bi-partisan support and passed on a voice vote, Porter would later suggest in a teevee ad that it wouldn't have become law without all his hard work. So that's what the song could mean for Porter. Also of course it applies to groupies.

"Party All The Time" by Eddie Murphy. 'Nuff said.

By all means everyone should play at home and, more importantly, at the office.

(A special salute, by the way, to the intrepid researcher in the Nevada Democratic Party who unearthed the magnificent photograph of Porter laying it down and impressing the girls with his soulful hepcat musician vibe.)

More sterling coverage for Southern Nevada's leading citizen

Remember the other day when George Will slapped on the kneepads and serviced wrote a meaningless puff piece on bitchy little area megalomaniac Sheldon Adelson?

Mother Jones takes a different approach and learns, among other things, that even his fellow warmongering wingnuts think Adelson is, well, a bitchy little megalomaniac.

Whoda thunk it?

Miniglean

• Finally, even if ever so gently and only in passing, somebody (other than the lowly Gleaner time and again) suggests that self-styled math whiz Bob Beers deserves blame for the state's budget fiasco. Neff/RJ
• "The question I would ask Gen. Petraeus," says NV CD2 Democratic candidate Jill Derby, "is this: The Army is saying that more than 25 percent of soldiers on third or fourth tours suffer mental health problems and Army Chief Of Staff General Casey called the Army 'out of balance.' What are we doing to help our troops, vets and their families deal with these issues?" Well, that's a good question, especially for various officials in the Bush administration generally and Veterans Affairs specifically, and might be productively lobbed at the congressman Derby would like to unseat, for that matter. But if limited to but one question for the Great and Magnificent Petraeus, a completely different direction might be in order, perhaps, oh, something along the lines of whether Iran's influence in Iraq has weakened or strengthened since the start of the troop escalation that the media so obediently refers to as the "surge."
• "There's an upside to the imminent death of Las Vegas," writes The Times of London's LA correspondent, Chris Ayres. "The place is a lot more fun than it used to be. There's less traffic, the restaurants are less crowded and you can actually get some elbow room at the blackjack tables." Snooty Brits.
• It would be virtually impossible for this Andrew Martin CD3 Democratic congressional candidate person to know less about local issues than he does about local politics — which frankly is all the more reason that Harry Reid and Friends should have returned his phone calls (Sun). Now he's probably going to cost Default Chosen One Robert Daskas money that would be better spent calling Jon Porter a career political hack on teevee. Yet again and as always, Harry, thanks so very much.

Area publication brings hope to otherwise doomed planet

"Climate change endangers human health," says Dr. Margaret Chan, the director of the World Health Organization. From something called Medical News Today:

"The warming of the planet will be gradual, but the effects of extreme weather events -- more storms, floods, droughts and heat waves -- will be abrupt and acutely felt," she added.

Chan explained that these trends disrupt the fundamentals of human health: "air, water, food, shelter and freedom from disease".

Many human diseases are climate sensitive, and warming up the Earth will increase the numbers of people exposed to diseases that today kill millions. These include malnutrition (kills over 3.5 million people a year), diarrhoeal diseases (kill over 1.8 million), and malaria (kills nearly 1 million).

...

Chan also spoke of how the consequences of climate change will not be evenly distributed, despite it being a global phenomenon:

"In short, climate change can affect problems that are already huge, largely concentrated in the developing world, and difficult to control."

Most disturbing.

Fortunately, it's all a bunch of hokum. As an editorial in a local newspaper explains, global temperatures might actually drop in 2008,so that proves conclusively and once and for all that global climate change is merely a hoax perpetrated on an unsuspecting public by wild-eyed eco-radicals who will not rest until they have crushed the life not only out of key industrial sectors but capitalism itself and replace it with their dark vision of the socialist nanny state.

The ultra-liberal naysaying doom and gloom crowd, their customary condescension in full plumage, will no doubt roll their eyes, giggle and snarkily suggest that the area editorial writers are confusing a change in the climate with a change in the weather.

But who are you going to trust — bunch of bureaucratic hacks at the World Health Organization (even their name has "world" in it, which of course is a dead giveaway for their agenda of global socialism commanded from the headquarters of a one-world government), or the scientists who write editorials at the local paper?

Lifestyles of the rich and richer

Fabulously wealthy Former First Lady Senator Hillbot (pictured, with new chief strategist) is no longer burdened with the services of Mark Penn, her very own Karl Rove. A union-hater, Penn ostensibly had to go because in the course of shilling all whore-like for one of his many, many other clients, he sung the praises of a free trade deal with Colombia.

Like U.S. free trade deals generally, the agreement mostly lacked any safeguards protecting labor, the environment and human rights. Apparently the former first lady's position, or at least her most recent one, via-a-vis such deals is "against." So that presented a good, public reason for Penn to go, supplementing the real reason, i.e., the former first lady will never ever be president, Penn's most despicable cynical efforts to help the Clintons destroy the Democratic Party notwithstanding, and at the end of the day everybody hates him anyway.

But the fabulously profitable Blackwater firm of private mercenaries, also one of Penn's clients, just got a contract extension to continue representing America's democratic ideals abroad, specifically in Iraq, as only Blackwater can. So however tough the economic outlook might be for America and Americans, Mark Penn will probably land on his feet.

In another, somewhat related item regarding the fabulously wealthy, Brian Greenspun, the patriarch of a local media and real estate concern, has used a column in one of his various publications to ask readers to answer his questions. Frankly, it would have been better for the struggling local economy had he spread some of his wealth around and commissioned consultants to gather the information for him, instead of just asking readers to work for free. Yet another means by which the rich stay richer, s'pose.

Anyway, one of the things the aforementioned patriarch wants to know is, "since when in this great democracy does one side in a presidential race get to overwhelm the country with his narrative about how democracy works?"

Hmm, probably depends on who you ask, but most observers agree that the presidential "election" of 2000 was certainly a watershed moment in the general area of the media shamefully allowing one side to frame the narrative about the democratic process. So that's one answer: Since 2000.

But turnabout being fair play and all (and more to the point of his question, for that matter), perhaps Greenspun would be magnanimous enough to answer a question from the Gleaner:

Since when does the media cover a presidential candidate as if she is still a viable contender even though the only "hope," for lack of a better word, she has of winning the nomination hinges on extraordinary circumstances so exotic and unforeseen that even her own campaign can't envision them?

If memory serves, this'd be the first year that's happened.