When John Ensign was running for Senate in 2000, one of the key arguments of his campaign was that, as a Republican, he would be able to convince fellow Republican senators to support Nevada in its fight against the Yucca Mountain nuke waste dump.
Of course, he fell flat on his face, failing to convert a single Republican senator.
Though chastened, the senator was not broken, and he quickly moved on to establish himself as a Senate leader on other issues, particularly intramural athletics. And through all the trials, tribulations and stress of representing the people and the state of Nevada in the United States Senate, Ensign has never neglected to tend to three key areas so important to his political career: his golf swing, his tan and his hair.
Now, all that hard work has paid off. The Hill has named Ensign one of the "50 Most Beautiful People on Capitol Hill."
Granted, he didn't make the top ten. That's reserved for hotties of a more youthful variety.
But all Nevadans should be proud to see their senator acknowledged for this stunning (and debonair) accomplishment. Between Harry Reid's leadership position and John Ensign's exorbitant prettiness, never has Nevada's representation in the world's most celebrated and exclusive deliberative body been more recognized.
I wonder he used some of his PAC money was used to influence this vote?
Posted by: myrna the minx | 07/25/2006 at 09:39 AM
Ahhh... the empty chair with the perfect hair shows us what he's good for.
This would even be funnier if good looks didn't actually translate into votes. Were he ugly he'd be voted out due to his lack of accomplishment. Since he's rico suave he's nearly a shoo-in. Isn't politics great!
Posted by: Sr. Bojangles | 07/25/2006 at 09:51 AM
Any truth to the rumor Ensign dies his hair to look more distinguished? The dumb ass certainly couldn't achieve distinction with his record.
Posted by: Demdozer | 07/25/2006 at 10:06 AM
The 48-year-old Ensign waxes philosophical about his graying hair, saying, "There's a Scripture that says gray hair is a sign of wisdom. I hope that's true."
Ummm, nuh-uh. Though it does contrast nicely with a tan.
Posted by: The Penguin | 07/25/2006 at 10:24 AM
It does the heart good to see that the ruling elites are not only richer and more powerful than the rest of us, but pertier, too.
Posted by: Nevada Scandalmonger | 07/25/2006 at 11:56 AM
Hey if Kerry can get botox, who are we to judge Ensign for being a pretty boy as well?
The real question is...if Ensign was standing in a hurricane, how powerful would it take before we ever saw Ensign's hair move? I say it would take at least a category 3.
Posted by: What Would Reagan Do? | 07/25/2006 at 12:26 PM
How is it that some of the purtiest girls are Republicans? Don't they know how damaging that is to their LTR prospects?
Posted by: The Penguin | 07/25/2006 at 12:50 PM
I have a theory on that Penguin.
The south tends to lean towards the democrats. The south is also known for inbreeding. Thus...
(yes that was a joke...please don't take it seriously...just a little political humor)
Posted by: What Would Reagan Do? | 07/25/2006 at 01:35 PM
True story:
When I was in my govt. high school class (this past yr....yes i know im the youngest on this board) but anyway....back in my Govt. class my teacher would try to get "big names" to do a video conference with the class. Last year she invited Harry Reid to do it and it was fun and great and all that jazz. Got to ask him some questions, his opinion on some issues yada yada yada. Now she then went and invited John Enisgn to do it. At first he agreed and we looked forward to the conference or what not (well...a few people did) but when the day came for the video feed, John Ensign pulled out....and i kid you not, because he didn't like the way his hair looked.
What a winner. He's not even good looking. Jesus, looks like he sleeps on a TANNING bed at night.
Posted by: Werd2406 | 07/25/2006 at 02:07 PM
Werd2406-
His hair probably got messed up from a windy day on the links. It occurs to me that in Washington, your golf score is directly proportional to your effectiveness. And one good thing you can say about Ensign is he's a damn good golfer.
Posted by: CollegeStudent | 07/25/2006 at 02:30 PM
I found the uglier are frequently the smarter. They end up using their assets...brains, and not their looks.
Posted by: Diogenes | 07/25/2006 at 03:00 PM
Ensign is the George Hamilton of Nevada politics. And not nearly as funny.
Posted by: The Penguin | 07/25/2006 at 04:50 PM
He does kind of look like George Hamilton, really the only difference is I've seen things Hamilton has done.
Posted by: CollegeStudent | 07/25/2006 at 10:49 PM
Don't know, but I kinda doubt Johnny-Boy ever got to dance with Imelda Marcos, which is something that Georgie-Boy did quite often!!!!!
That, and make silly movies.
Posted by: Donald Rilea | 07/28/2006 at 01:23 PM